every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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