PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
