I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
