I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
