Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say š
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
You told him he ācould park his dick in your garageā.
Well he didnāt. It shouldnāt be this hard to get a penis.
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