kristin has been a bad kristin
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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