You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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