Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
The adults are the big ones right?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
