your room smells of hookers.
And success
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize