new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
