last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
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