Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
