i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
