I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
two words: eviction party
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
