I wannas sexs uuuuu
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
