so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Randomize
