69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
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