My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
