its not stalking. its research.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
