everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just cropdusted the office
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Randomize
