As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
