a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
