omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Randomize
