I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize