So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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