wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
