I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
