Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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