Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
