Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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