at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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