I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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