exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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