I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
