they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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