Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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