Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
