1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
