I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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