Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize
