Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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