i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
