think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Randomize
