I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
