maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
