Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
