how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
