I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
