Pregnant stripper...not hot.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
