Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
